Musings on love and marriage
by Veryawen
Summary: Elrond on his wedding day. Not very happy and it's slash.


Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. I'm not making any money off this story.

A/N: Just a little something I thought up when I couldn't sleep and felt a little sad. It is slash, but has no scenes that might offend anyone since it is merely mentioned not practiced, and I don't expect any flames about it. If it offends you, you have been warned and need not read it!

Elrond looked towards the bed one last time, drinking in the sight of long silver hair spread over the pillows and a strong, lean body outlined under the thin sheet covering it. He did not wish to go and leave his love but unfortunately he had little choice in the matter. He stopped before the door to ponder whether he could turn back but realized quickly that he could not and with a deep sigh he stepped through the door and closed it quietly behind him.

Upon entering the sitting room of his suite he drew the attention of the two elves waiting there and the both turned around to look at him whith sadness in their eyes. 

"I do not wish to talk about it", he said with a weary voice, "I feel there has been enough talking and there is nothing more to be said, or indeed done." 

The other two elves excanged a glance and darkhaired Erestor said cautiously: 

"If that is your wish we will not say another word. Just know that if you indeed wish to talk we will both be here for you."

Elrond merely nodded a reply to this before sitting down on a low stool and gesturing for his blond friend to begin the process of braiding his hair. Glorfindel took the brush from the table beside his lord and began brushing his hair with smooth, long strokes. 

Elrond closed his eyes and let his mind wander. His thoughts drawn unbidden to the first time he met his silverhaired love. It hade been when he was sent to aid Eregion against the forces of evil. His love had been one of Celeborns lieutenants and at first Elrond had not found him all that enticing. Yes there was no denying he was beautiful but his demeanour had been cold and he had seemed not at all interested in listening to any of Elronds suggestions on the retreat, or anything else for that matter, and this in turn had led Elrond to believe he was a bit to full of himself. 

In retrospect Elrond realised that a war where one has seen ones home being destroyed is perhaps not the best place to show the best sides of ones personality but at the time he had not thougt of that and for the most part ended up avoiding his loves presence. 

It had not been until they had reached the valley of Imladris and begun it's founding that Elrond had realised that he might have jugded to quickly. Elrond had made Glorfindel responsible for the armed forces there and as Celeborn and Galadriel no longer had a realm of ther own and therefore no use for lieutenants his love has asked permission to stay and had on Glorfindels insistence become his second in command.  

At first they hade been a bit wary of each other. Elrond still not sure of the other elf no matter that Glorfindel said he was not at all what Elrond thought and his love no doubt feeling that Elrond had some misgivings about him which in turn made him wary of Elrond. Despite these initial problems they had in the end made an effort to get to know each other and then realised that they did enjoy the others company and had proceded to become close friends. It had then taken them a few years of dancing around each other before they came to the conclusion that they were indeed deeply in love and could not imagine life without the other. Alhough at first none of them had been brave enough to admit to their feelings and it had taken both Erestor's and Glorfindel's combined efforts to make them se the truth. It had been quite a way they had done it in as well. Elrond smiled to himself at the mere thought of it but the smile soon died on his lips and his thoughts returned to the purpose of this day. 

The time that followed had been a happy one and they had both thought that nothing could come between them. Indeed not even the Last Alliance had managed to break them apart the way it had done to so many others. There had been a time when Elrond had sat at his loves bedside and feared the worst but he had survived his injury and they had both been happy for it. No. it would seem that what the battlefield could not break apart other forces would soon sunder.

Glorfindel had now finished Elronds hair and motioned for him to stand. This he did and walked over to Erestor who was preparing the robes he was to wear today. He spared them no glance as he did not care much what they looked like and instead just let Erestor begin the process of dressing him.

He could still remember Galadriel coming to him and telling him that he could not have a male lover and would have to marry an elven maid. At first he had told her that he did not think it any of her business who he loved or took to his bed but upon hearing the reason for her meddling he became unsure of what to do. Galadriel could be rather forceful at times and they did not always get along but Elrond was well aware that the visions she had of the future was true ones and could not just be ignored. Unfortunately for Elrond and his love it was apparently vital for the future of Arda that he had heirs and they could not be had with a male lover, it was just physically impossible. 

In the end they had both felt that they could not be responsible for what would happen if Galadriels visions did not come to pass and had decided that the only thing to do was give up their love and let Elrond marry. It had felt as though his life had ended the day the decision was made but they both knew that they had to continue and perhaps hope that someday there would be a way for them. It was not easy to have hope since marriage was binding and Elrond knew that even if he did not love his future wife he would not be unfaithful to her and would never ask her to have their vows broken, most especially not if they had children togheter. All this made the situation seem utterly hopeless however you looked at it. 

Galadriel had then proceded to offer her and Celeborn's daughter Celebrían as his bride and he had not protested the choice. It mattered little to him who he married and besides, it was almost certain that the lady of light had some hidden reason for choosing lady Celebrían. He was however not so certain whether it was right to keep Celebrían in the dark about his true love but Galadriel had again insisted saying that at least one of the parties in the marriage should have the chance to be happy and Elrond had again relented to her will. How Celebrían was supposed to be happy with a husband who did not love her back was not explained by Galadriel but Elrond felt that he had not the energy to ask and indeed not certain whether he would like to hear the answer. For now Elrond was glad that he at least liked Celebrían well enough, perhaps they could at least be friends even if Elrond could not return any eventual love she may have for him.

Elrond's musings was interrupted when Erestor asked him to turn around so he would have better access to him and upon turning he found himself face to face with his bedroom door. 

His thoughts turned to his love who was still inside the bedroom. He knew that when he left the suite with Glorfindel and Erestor his loves brothers would come to take him and his belongings with them to start their journey to Lothlórien. It had been decided by both of them that he could not stay here, it would be much to painful to see each other but not be able to share the same intimacy anymore, and Celeborn had upon realising this invited him to come to their realm and once again become one of his lieutenants. His love had gratefully accepted the offer as is was the best thing to do and that was the end of it.

"My lord?", came Glorfindel's voice. 

Elrond raised his sad eyes to Glorfindel's sparkling blue ones and Glorfindel continued with: "We have finished. Are you ready to go?" 

Elrond turned toward the mirror and gave a brief glance to his wedding attire before saying in a low voice: "I am as ready as I will ever be." 

He then turned back in the direction if the bedroom door and whispered in a broken voice:

"Remember I will love you always. Forgive me for what I am about to do." 

He then turned swiftly, nearly knocking Erestor who was standing right behind him to the floor in the process, and strode to the door leading out to the corridor beyond his suite. Glorfindel's own heart nearly shattered when he heard the mumbled words from Elrond when he passed him by:

"Haldir my love..."

I welcome any comments and constructive critisism…..


End file.
